3 Weddings and a Funeral

Mali is a very "event" oriented culture unlike the western world which is very "time" oriented. So while living or visiting in Mali it's important to be flexible and also remember that even if you can only be at an "event" for 15 minutes you have shown your face and therefore you participated in the event.

Since December we have been to 3 weddings and a funeral all very important "life passage events". The first wedding was of the son of one of Gordon's Rotary friends, the most elaborate and expensive and different (very western in many ways) one we've attended in 20 years here in Mali. There was a huge dinner at a fancy hotel and we were told by one of our malian friends "dress western style and your job is to go and enjoy the evening at their expense", There were griots singing songs and people literally throwing money at them in the equivalent of $10 and $20 bills as well as a few US$100 bills . The following day we were invited to the home of the parents for another party which was more Malian in nature. For this we were told to dress in all of our traditional finery. This was when we could give a gift and we went expecting to spend the day with them. We never did see the bride and groom though because they are "hidden away" in another part of the house for a week together.

Wedding #2 was less extravagant but nevertheless very different from anything we'd experienced before. For one thing, both the bride and the groom were escorted into the church by their father. The church was decorated with all kinds of flowing cloth and bows and ribbons everywhere. The groom is a pastor and the son of a pastor and one of the last two single pastors to be married. There was lots of music included as part of the ceremony and because the groom is the leader of a well known Christian musical group there were many people from all over the city in attendance. One of the big cultural items that shocked us into the 21st century was that the Maid of Honor was dressed in a pant suit, never before seen by us (or maybe anybody) at a wedding!

Wedding # 3 was downscaled even more but beautiful in its own simple way. The unique part of this one was that Gordon had the honor of doing the ceremony for this young couple. The groom is a good friend of our son James and the third in their little group of friends to be married. He's also the last single C&MA Bamako pastor to be married. It was the first time that I (Cheryl) had gone to the Mayor's office to witness the legal ceremony before the church ceremony took place. I was in the middle of alot of joyful chaos and because I have white hair and am very short they pushed me to the front so I had a great view.

The Funeral was for the wife of a retired pastor. She'd actually been married to two pastors over the years, after the first died she married a second one. She was 93 years old and her dying words were ones of blessing for those who would continue in ministry. May we all come to the end of our time here on earth with encouraging words in our hearts for those who remain.